Marriage

One of my friend recently shared a video in Facebook. The video goes like this.

'A girl and guy are arranged for a formal meeting by their parents. They meet. Girl 'fixes' 20 questions max to get to know each other. Guy accepts. At the end of the Q & A session girl realizes that there is nothing in common so it wouldn't be right for them to marry. Guy realizes!! that she is the better half of him and would like to know more about her interests and make her happy in life. Video ends showing they are married and live happily ever after. There is a statistics displayed at the end of the video saying "over 90% of the marriages in India are arranged and only 5% end in divorce"

Now, i would have loved the video (expect for the girl's acting???) for the direction, the flow in which the Q & A session went if not for the statistics towards the end. When i gave a comment that "success of marriage is not measured by the percentage of divorce" my friend shot back asking "all u could c of the 11 minute video is the statistics that is displayed for less a second?". I would like to recall a quote told by cine poet writer Thamari in a discussion "There should be more divorce". What she was intending to say, which she failed to clarify in the discussion, was that people in marriage who do not find each other happy should come out of the fear for society, fear for family pressure and stand up for themselves. I am glad Thamarai made such a statement in a society where people live for the society more than for themselves. They lose their identity or should i say they wear false identities to have a life that the society would accept of.

The intention of the video was clear, advocating arranged marriage saying only 5% of them end. I am not advocating against arranged marriage here just because i had a love marriage. And i do not say everyone should go for love marriage, i only intend to say that marriages succeed/break not because it is arranged or loved but because of the individuals involved. That was indeed clear in the video when the guy asks the girl what would make her happy. It is nothing to do with the way marriage happens

A marriage 'succeeds' when both of them are happy. A marriage may also 'succeed' when either decides to forgo their wishes for the other, of course with full heart, out of true love. A marriage 'exists' when one of them suppresses their feelings, leads a mechanical life, smiling outside, crying inside. And lastly a marriage breaks when either one or both wanted to stand up for themselves.

It is the 'exists' part that the society should worry about more than the 'break'.

வாழ்க்கை!!

வாழ்க்கையை வாழ பெற்றோர் கற்பிப்பதில்லை

வேலை செய்ய கல்வி கற்பிப்பதில்லை

விட்டில் பூச்சியென தொலைவில் தெரியும்

வெளிச்சத்தை நோக்கி பறக்கிறேன்

வெளிச்சத்தை அடைவதற்குள்

வாழ்க்கை முடிந்துவிடுகிறது!!

Best Ways to Kill a Lion !

Newton 's Method:

Let, the lion catch you.

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.. Implies you caught lion.

Einstein Method:

Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.

Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.

Software Engineer Method:

Catch a cat and claim that your testing has proven that its a Lion.If anyone comes back with issues tell that you will upgrade it to Lion.

Indian Police Method:

Catch any animal and interrogate it & torture it to accept that its a lion .

Rajnikanth Method :

Keep warning the lion that u may come and attack anytime. The lion will live in fear and die soon in fear itself.

Jayalalitha Method:

Send Police commissioner Muthukaruppan around 2AM and kill it, while it's sleeping !


Manirathnam Method (director):

Make sure the lion does not get sun light and put the lion in a dark room with a single candle lighted.

Keep murmuring something in its ears. The lion will be highly irritated and commit suicide.

Karan Johar Method (director):

Send a lioness into the forest. Our lion and lioness fall in love with each other.

Send another lioness in to the forest, followed by another lion. First lion loves the first lioness and the second lion loves the 2nd

lioness. But 2nd lioness loves both lions. Now send another lioness (third) into the forest.You don't understand right... ok....

read it after 15 yrs, then also u wont!

Yash Chopra method (director):

Take the lion to Australia or US.. and kill it in a good scenic location.

Govinda method:

Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days.

Menaka Gandhi method:

Save the lion from a danger and feed him with some vegetables continuously.


George bush method:

Link the lion with Osama bin laden and then shoot him!!!


Ravi Shastri method:

ask the lion to bowl at u. U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run Lion tired and surrenders ,,......

Rajnikanth's Method:

Remove the make-up and put it over lion. The lion will die notwithstanding that heavy weight.

Story - "Silent Admirer" - Episode 1

The classroom was very silent. Professor Chandrasekhar was very busy scribbling the palindrome program on the board. Pooja was starring at the board. She is an intelligent girl and always aims for coming first in the college. She stays in the hostel and visits her parents twice a month during weekends.

"Pooja , what are you thinking. Are you concentrating or not", hearing the Prof's voice Pooja came to the present. Her thoughts was wavering somewhere. For the last fews days she felt that someone is following her to the hostel. She decided to tell discuss this with Archana today.

"Arch, I want to talk to you de"..

"Let him finish, already he warned you. Will talk during lunch". Arch told her. Pooja replied, "Fine, let us alone go for lunch." Arch nodded.

Pooja and Archana were very close friends. Archana lives with her parents near college. She helps Pooja in her studies and they both are good at sports too. They play basket ball and national players.

"Can i take Pooja with me", one of the clerk asked the professor and took her to the headmaster room.

Her Uncle was sitting in the chair. His eyes looked tired and Pooja could sense that he might have cried whole night. "What happened a sudden visit", she wondered.

"Thank You Sir. I will come back for the TC and other formalities", her uncle finally told the headmaster.

"There might have been a conversation already happened between them", She was confused and lots of things were running in her mind. Without a clue, her headmaster left his room urgently and she turned to her Uncle.

"Uncle, what happened?", "Don't ask anything. I will tell you everything on the way. You pack all your things and start immediately". A sudden fear gasped her throat. She got scared and wanted to know what has happened in her house. She ran to talk to Archana.

"I am really scared Archana, Uncle has come to take me and he said something about TC to headmaster before i could even speak he rushed for a meeting. I will call you immediately once I reach home."

"You wanted to talk to me in lunch right, is this anything related to that". Arch asked her. "Oh, thats totally different, I will go home and call you tonight. Will update you"

"Pooja take care. If you need my help I am here always", Pooja felt so happy that she have a very caring friend.

On the way, her uncle did not open his mouth. She had so many questions, none were answered. They reached home and she saw a crowd standing outside. she entered the house and all she was able to do was let out a loud cry. There in the center of the hall, both her parents were lying with a white cloth tightly wrapped over the body.

"The doctors have postmortem the bodies and confirmed that it was a murder", her uncle said and weeped badly..

GAME OF GOD - Chapter I

The hospital was busy except for the department where I was seated. The fragrance of lavender breezed through the place. The doctor seldom gets visitor I guess though there are lot of insane crowd. I sat there gazing at the board which read “Dr. Shaam MBBS MD (psychiatrist)”. “Well, eight years he has wasted in his life to live amidst insane crowd” I said to myself, losing all my patience. Well those words were uttered in a fit of anger, for having brought me here.  I just wanted out to shout out to this world “people, I myself is a psychologist and have counseled several stressed out dimwits and made them sense reality”. Time is not a medicine for wound but rather a device that drills more nails when you try to pluck out one. I am not a philosopher neither was it my subject during the university days. But you wouldn’t get a better professor than time to teach you the theories and am proud to introduce myself as his favorite student, for having taught me all the notes at the cost of my happiness.

Finding it hard to take my words? Yup and that’s the same feeling I would have when an unknown tries to load me with his troubles especially during the first meet. So I don’t wish to be an ‘unknown’ to my readers, for all reasons to take the story forward.

I am known to this world by the name ‘Vasanth’ though my friends call me ‘Vasu’ and for my best friend I am a ‘buffalo’ (though there is no resemblance). I am not sure if I have crossed so much in life to pen down my tales but definitely I have enough experiences to share, the experiences which have made me wait at the reception desk of a psychiatrist. Its half past three and I have waiting for more than an hour by now. Never had I made my patients wait for one reason that I hate to wait for others unnecessarily. Frustrated I approached the desk and a beauty in mid twenties answered my call with sweet tone, “how may I help you? “.

Pacified by now I said “you may help in several different ways for several things, but as of now let me know where is your darling doctor?”

She replied with slight smile “I guess he would be here in an hour”.  “

“An hour? What fuckin business he has?  Having given me the appointment at 2pm.”

Chuckling for my remarks she said “Vasanth, I am afraid if I would be able to give the right answer to your question but I believe from his message that he is struck in traffic. Well, in case you feel restless can I give you company? “.

 “Company….?  I would love to but not under this situation...” (She interrupts) “Excuse me  ... I meant for a cup of coffee “.

Needless t o say that we found a corner seat in the café, forcing others into perceptional errors. The conversation started in a simple way about variety of patients visiting the hospital, ways of handling them and shifted to clairvoyance. She did believe when I said I am good reading mindset of humans especially tuning my mind to theirs. When she asked me to prove,

I said “right now your thought is about me. You have a question in your mind and that too is about me.” “Well… then can you say what that is?”

“It’s just this, why is this impressive, smart chap is in here as a visitor to a psychiatrist? Am I right?”

“I agree with you on your talent”.

“Thanks for that but even are unaware of the reason until I get to understand it from your doctor who had sent a mail inviting me to his hospital for a discussion”. She stared at me for a minute till I broke in saying “do you mind me if I say that your current thought is a curiosity to know my story, isn’t it?”

“Well Mr. Clairvoyant, it’s time for us to leave. The doctor would be here any minute”.

True to her words the doctor came in next ten minutes with no apologies for his delay. ”fifteen years of experience and still people don’t learn basics” I murmured. After another fifteen minutes of wait I finally entered the doctor’s cabin. The very look of him showed me that he needs some treatment from my end and I felt like asking him

“Shaam do you need any help from me in finding a cure for some kind of mental illness that you suffer from?” But it was a surprise that I did really utter those words which I found from his response

“Nope. But rather I wanted to ask the same question to you”.

“What? Mental sickness for me? You mean to say you called me in for a treatment? If you had mistaken me for one among your insane crowd then it’s you who deserve the treatment” I blasted out.

Yet there was smile as response from him. “Well Vasanth, I had called you for a discussion based on the request from one of your friend, whose identity would remain confidential till our discussion is done”.

“Shaam you know that I show no abnormality and am a psychologist as well.  Moreover the cause of this discussion is to be kept secret....do u think I have gone nuts to waste my time in fuckin you’re ……? Well I have other better jobs to look at and will never forgive you for taking 3 precious hours of my agenda. Good bye”.

There was no opposition from him and he just said “good bye. See you soon”.

“What comment was that? You think you are a beautiful whore to keep visiting you again and again? Enough of you wasting my time and I wish to end it with this” I stormed out of his cabin.

She shook up to ask me “do u need a vehicle to be arranged, how far is your residence?”

“No thanks my friend Raj would be here to pick me up and am going with him for a drink. Your insane doctor has spoiled my day and I need some peace at this moment which only my raj can give”.

 “Well, I really wonder why an appointment was fixed for a smart chap like you. It wouldn’t be nice to tell see you in next visit but…. “ 

“Lady…”I started but she interrupted saying “call me Nisha”. “Ya Nisha... Nice name as sweet as you. This is my card and you can call me anytime. But now I have to go as raj would be waiting for me“. I quickly left the place and came out.

I know about my best friend. As expected he was waiting outside for me in our bike. “So what did he have to discuss with you” was the first question from Raj. “Nothing man. He has become incurably insane after living amidst the crowd of similar people. He said that someone had requested him to counsel me to get me out of some sort of mental illness.” “What” he sighed,” I know you sometimes behave differently but had least intension recommending a treatment. Even otherwise I would send you to a vet and not to a psychiatrist, you buffalo”. “Raj, let’s move from here, my thirst is pushing me for a drink”. We just left the place with no trace behind.

Nisha felt lazy but had no other option to pick up the call.” Hello Dr. Shaam’s office “A husky voice responded “Did Vasanth meet the doctor today? “.

 “Yes he did and left just now”. “

 Well any clue on where he is going to?”

“I am not aware of the exact location, but he said he is going out with his friend Raj”

“Raj? Did he say Raj” the voice was filled with anxiety

“Yes… he said his friend would be waiting for him and they are planning to go for a drink. Anything wrong? Any problem for Vasanth? ”

“No... Well…. Yes........watever it may be. Connect the call to Mr.Shaam Please"

Nisha left with no other option connected the line to Shaam. The only thought in her mind was what wrong with Mr. Clairvoyant?

Read this when u need a break !!!

Common Announcements which conveys a Special Meaning to us

Spotted in a toilet of a London office: * TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW. *

In a London Laundromat: *

AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT*

Outside a London second-hand shop: *

WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN? *

Spotted in a safari park: *

ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR *

Seen during a London conference: *

FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR*

Notice in a field: *

THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES*

On a repair shop door: *

WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR, THE BELL DOESN'T WORK) *

People in other countries sometimes go out of their way to communicate with their English-speaking tourists. Here is a list of signs seen around the world :

At a Budapest zoo: *

PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY.*

Doctors office, Rome : *

SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES*.

Hotel, Acapulco : *

THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE. *

In a Nairobi restaurant: *

CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE SHOULD WAIT AND SEE THE MANAGER*.

In a City restaurant: *

OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO*.

In a Calcutta Coffee House:*

PEOPLE DISCARDING CIGARETTE STUBS IN CUPS WILL BE SERVED COFFEE IN ASH TRAYS

ஒரு குற்றச்சாட்டு . ஒரு சுய விளக்கம்

யானை வரும் பின்னே மணி ஓசை வரும் முன்னே என்ற இந்த கட்டுரை முழுக்க முழுக்க ஆசிரியரின் கற்பனை யே.

ஏன் சொல்கிறேன் என்றால் அம்பி மாமா ஏப்பம் விடுவதை அவரே நீண்ட நாட்களாக பார்கவில்லை காரணம் அவர் அஜீரணத்தில் அவதி பட்டு கொண்டு இருக்கிறார் .

இரண்டாவதாக அவர் லாங் வாக் போகிறார் என்ற குற்றச்சாட்டு . அவரால் அரை கிலோமீட்டர் நடந்தாலே மேல் மூச்சு கீழ் மூச்சு வாங்க அண்டா கவுந்து அல்வா தொங்கி விடுபவர் . அதனால் வெறும் மிக மிக சின்ன வாக் தான் செல்கிறார். காரணம் தொப்பை . இதற்கு சாட்சி இன்னொரு தொப்பை மாமா வசந்த் .

பெரும்பாலும் அவர் மனதில் பட்டதை அந்த இடத்திலேயே சீரியஸ் ஆக சொல்வார். அனால் அது காமெடி ஆக புரிந்துபடுவது அவர் பிறவி பயன் அல்லது பிறவி துர்பாக்கியம் என்று நினைப்பவர் .

நான்கவதாக அம்பி ஒரு வெள்ளை மனது உடையவர் மற்றும் கள்ளம் கபடம் இல்லாதவர் . அதனால் படுத்தால் ஆனது தூங்கி விடுபவர் ( வீட்டில் தான் ). தற்போது மனைவி வீட்டில் இல்லாததால் விடிய காலையில் எழுப்பி விட யாரும் இல்லாதவர் . ( அம்மா செல்லம் என்பதால் அம்மாவிற்கு ஒரு போதும் எழுப்பி விட மனம் வருவதில்லை ). இந்த நிலையில் அவர் ஓரிரண்டு நாட்கள் கொஞ்சம் லேட் ஆக வருவதுண்டு அனால் கட்டுரை ஆசிரியர் குறிப்பிடும் அளவு செகண்ட் ஷிபிட் வலைக்கு வருவது இல்லை.

அதானால் தான் சொல்கிறேன் , இந்த கட்டுரை முழுக்க முழுக்க ஆசிரியரின் கற்பனை யே.